We all understand what an argument is, at least in lay man’s terms – a type of disagreement between at least two people where each side tries to convince the other to accept their belief or opinion. Nonetheless, this simple everyday word can be approached from a variety of different angles, each with their own nuances.
Arguments can be heated, personal and tense confrontations between people, where emotions flair and relationships suffer. Arguments can also be lively and cordial debates, where people try to change each other’s opinions in a calm, controlled and respectful manner, as you might see on a TV show or in a college seminar. There is also a formal, academic definition of an argument – an argument is a set of statements that is intended to persuade someone of a particular idea or conclusion. These formal arguments are not a conversation between two or more people, but rather an abstract series of ideas which can be analyzed and studied in a vacuum.
In this article you will learn to avoid and manage aggressive and damaging arguments in your relationships, learning how to defuse hostile and rage-filled confrontations between people when they occur, but also the steps you can take to avoid them altogether. These types of arguments will be examined for close and distant relationships – how we argue with a spouse or brother is undoubtedly different to how we argue with a professional colleague, which in turn is different from an argument between yourself and a stranger.
However, we will also delve into the intriguing topic of argumentation and debate from the angle of trying to actually convince people of your ideas and win debates. Naturally, some of us are better at phrasing our arguments compared to other people. Almost everyone has felt the frustration of being unable to convince someone of an idea, even though we strongly believe or know our idea to be correct. Yet all of us can think of one person who has a knack of convincing other people to believe or accept their ideas, even if their ideas are false or doubt worthy.
This is due to the psychological aspect to convincing someone of an idea, with factors such as the rapport, timing and delivery of the argument affecting whether or not the person is receptive. This type of subtle social manipulation is skill by itself and you can also learn the ways you can change your body language and speech to make other people agreeable.
Nonetheless, regardless of the social skills of the person who is delivering an argument, some arguments are just better than others. Throughout history people have studied why certain arguments seem to be effective and why others are not. Over time this study has coalesced into the field of logic, which has established rules and laws of what makes a ‘valid’ argument.
